The Iowa State Cyclones defeat #5 Kansas in front of a standing room only crowd. Hilton Magic lives, Fred looks dreamier than ever and Royce White transforms from airball to clutch.

and the peasents rejoice!

In what has certainly turned into one of the bigger Big 12 matchups of the year, the Kansas Jayhawks, undefeated in conference play, come into Hilton Coliseum to face an Iowa State team looking for a big win. After letting a couple of games slip away, Iowa State has a legitimate shot to upset a top ten team. To do so, they will need to contain both Thomas Robinson and Tyshawn Taylor, as well as having a good shooting game themselves.

It's a sellout at Hilton, and the atmosphere should be one of the best in years.

I had intended to use a different term in the headline, but gave in to the man. Who wants a bunch of Alanis Morissette fans on here anyway? Besides, any good blogger knows you never pass up an opportunity to post a South Park clip.

With Saturday's win over Texas Tech, Iowa State has now donkey-punched three schools in BOTH football and men's basketball. I don't really know how this compares historically and researching that would take away from valuable internet porn time, suffice it to say it hasn't happened often in the last decade.

If we ignore the outside shot of defeating UConn in a post season tourney, three schools probably rounds out the list. And yes, we realize we play Oklahoma State & Texas Tech in basketball one more time, but we all know the outcomes:

• The Red Raider basketball team will be a shell of itself, down to a handful of walk-ons and a pinball wizard stumbling into Hilton at that point - it will be a mercy killing
• The Cowboys will play ISU tough through 4 quarters only to fall on an inevitable last second shot in OT. It's science.

Presenting your 2011-12 Iowa State Cyclone town bicycles:

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IOWA STATE OVERLOAD. Already somewhat covered, but ESPN seems to have declared 1/26/2012 Iowa State Day, with a look at Royce White's past, his taking of a leadership role, and another on the return of the Mayor.

KO RISING. After we all thought Kelechi Osemele might fall from his preseason first round projection well into the 2nd or 3rd round, he seems to be making a comeback, falling in the first round in both SBNation's and the National Football Post's mock drafts.

BEATING IOWA STATE IN 2011 IS A PREREQUISITE FOR AN NFL JOB. Or so it appears. Greg Schiano is Tampa Bay's new coach, while Mike Sherman looks poised to take over Miami's offense. Kirk Ferentz? Still hanging out in Iowa City after months of KC rumors.

QB TWITTER FIGHT! Incoming QB Chad Kelly is already telling teammates he's coming for their spot. Predictably, it was not received well. If only Twitter was around for the Austen Arnaud-Phil Bates QB saga...

NEINAS IS A HATER. Chuck makes some strong statements on Mizzou and the Big East, while saying West Virginia will play in the Big 12 next year.

FRAN FRAN FRAN. Iowa lost to Nebrasketball last night, which no one cares about. But it did provide freakout 1 and freakout 2 of Fran McCaffrey.

ESPN celebrated Royce-mania today by taking in depth look at his life, chronicling his anxiety, how he almost went to Kentucky, his rise at Iowa State, and the hours he puts in at the Sukup Basketball facility, "the multimillion-dollar building's brick facade and glistening glass belie the cornfields scattered around it. It's a vivid contrast to the surrounding area's rural roots."

Wait, what? Here's an actual shot of the Sukup Basketball Facility.

Here's a shot of construction, taken from the parking lot of the adjacent residential complex (that most ISU students have probably passed out partied at).

Apparently, Field of Dreams made ESPN believe we could only do sports related things in the middle of cornfields.

You don't have to be crazy to blow $47.7 million. But it helps.

Mack "Brownster" Brown is a simple guy. Loves football, loves Texas and loves coaching, despite not being especially good at it. But unknown to him, Brownster has a wealthy benefactor; the University of Texas athletic director DeLoss Dodds. In order to find out if Brownster knows the value of money, DeLoss has a little proposition for him...

(Interior of DeLoss Dodd's office. Dodds is huffing an ether-soaked rag)

DeLoss Dodds: Let me tell you a little story, Brownster. When I was seven years old, my daddy caught me smoking a cigar. Locked me in a broom closet for two days and two nights with nothing more than a box of cigars and a book of matches. No food Brownster, no water, just those goddamn cigars. Wouldn't let me out till I finished every last one of them. Taught me a HELL of a lesson! So I'm gonna do what my daddy did to me. I'm gonna waste as much goddamn money as possible to prove a ridiculous point!

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ECOKAT ISN"T STOPPENS POPPENS. Chelsea had 23 points, 9 rebounds, and 2 assists in a victory over Kansas State.

BIG 12 POWER. If you care about school rankings for all sports, the Big 12 is doing pretty well, with Iowa State checking in at #22 overall.

TIME FOR RICK BARRY COACHING? Royce White talks about his struggles at the free throw line.

A "TRADITIONALIST" is what Bobby Elliot calls himself, in discussing his decision to leave Iowa State for Notre Dame.

DUDE PEPPER SPRAYS CHICK. Yeah, that's not reversed. UNM walkon QB Ryan Trujillo did this to his girlfriend after an argument.

LEBRYAN'D. The Oklahoma State freshman poured in a career best 27 points to upset #2 Missouri. Let's hope he's not this good when we visit GIA.