Headlines Left on the Cutting Room Floor

We recently added a new gimp to our super secret idea generator/dungeon and he discovered the origins of WRNL.  With it he also found some old and unused headlines.

WRNL didn't start until the middle of 2010 but within a day of the idea being pitched we were up and running.  Our first article can even be found here.

While our gimp was digging through the archives he ran across the following headlines from the first few days, unused for whatever reason.

"Barta/Delaney Sticks Foot in Orifice Normally Reserved for Penises/Food"

"Herky pleads guilty to sexual assault of Brutus, the Ohio State Nut.. plea bargains to serve halftime in prison thanks to UI defense team"

"Herky Revealed to be Bastard Child of Pierre Pierce and Jon Lickliter"

"Lil' Red told to cut down on high fructose corn syrup intake. Nebraska fans depressed."

"IQ Tests performed on Baylor Bear. Yep, he's retarded"

"K-State's Wildcat - the creation of artists with downs syndrome"

"Ralphie Credited with Giving AIDS to Magic Johnson"

No wonder Colorado left the Big XII to join the Pac 12... they wanted to get closer to their long lost lover.

Stay tuned, we might re-post some of those old gems of ours that actually got published.