Kansas: It's Not North Korea!
by ClonesJer on Nov 2, 2011 7:44 AM CDT
in Around College Football
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Kansas Football is going through some rough times right now. The 2010 season wasn't pleasant, but 2011 proves just how bad it can get. In fact the site FireJerryKill.com goes through a somewhat rigorous statistical exercise to prove just how bad Kansas is, and concludes not only are they worse than Minnesota, they're worse than everybody!
Normally we here at WRNL would pile on and make fun of all the pain the Jayhawks are going through, it's kind of our thing. But we're not totally soulless and really, that's just beating a dead horse. Instead, we extend an olive branch to our neighbors to the southwest, here is a list of nice things about Kansas and Jayhawk football:
Turner Gill is incompetent, not incontinent: The Jayhawks head coach has yet to wear adult diapers on the side lines, something Kansas State can’t claim.
Memorial Stadium could hold a pretty sweet track meet: At any moment outdoor track enthusiasts could host a meet in conjunction with a football game. It’s a football field AND a track ... it’s like the Swiss Army Knife of Big XII venues.
Awesome Seats Bro!: Getting tickets is not an issue in Lawrence; get 'em cheap - right up front!
Turner Gill seems like a nice guy to have as a neighbor: Coach Gill seems like the kind of dude that never mows before 8AM and always gives you a friendly wave. In fact, he's #1 on the Stanford review's list of "Head Coaches Least Likely to be a Pedophile".
Kansas almost never has Hurricanes: There's a Cyclone joke in there somewhere, but seriously they have somewhat mild weather minus the whole Dorothy and Toto bit.
It's nice to see a place that gives white guys a chance to play basketball: Besides Duke.
The obesity rate is relatively low: Compared to SEC country anyway, although a lot of that can be attributed to Mangino moving out of the state.
Sense of Loyalty: Kansas would never be fucking assholes like Texas A&M, they would also never allow dude-on-dude cheerleading porn to have a place on their sidelines. Those are called "family values", people.
It's not North Korea: Sure, Turner Gill is widely known as the coach that doesn't allow naughty words at practice, but his is nowhere near an actual communist regime. Additionally, Kansas was admitted to the union in 1861 and is definitely not controlled by an often-caricatured, evil dictator. America, fuck yeah!
Roy is still stealing our children: So he left you for a prettier state ... at least he's still gutting Iowa of its finest basketball talent. Rest assured, we still loathe that cocksucker.
Kansas Swear Jar Count: 5
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KU Fucking sucks!
Add that to your cocksucking, motherfucking, piece of shit swear jar.
Assholes!
Oh, and Roy is a complete fuckwad. I hate that son of a bitch with a fiery passion that burns but does not consume. There is a special place in hell for that cumdumpster.
(Just had to get into the spirit of fucking KU week.)
That Fire Jerry Kill Site is Well Put Together
The Turner Gill card is great, but did you scroll down and check out that sweet statistical analysis they did on the worst AQ team? Yep. It’s Kansas. I sure as shit hope we don’t lose this weekend.
http://www.firejerrykill.com/2011/10/31/who-is-the-worst-aq-conference-team/
Actually, I sure hope they don’t fire Turner Gill before Saturday. The Jayhawks are liable to pull a CU on us if they do.
did you not read past the first sentance? that hurts man
just because I rock, doesn't mean I'm made of stone.
According to mizzou fans
KU fans make Iowa and their trailer park nation look polite and welcoming, according to an older mizzou donor i spoke to a few weeks ago. I talked to him in the Porto line at the tailgate in Columbia. He said a KU student came up to his wife, looked her in the eye and yelled “fuck you and fuck your cunt!”
Like a boss KU fan, like a boss…
by CyssorMeTimbers on Nov 2, 2011 12:02 PM CDT reply actions
Take that with a grain of salt
KU fans say the same about Mizzou, and you and I both had a good time in Columbia.
It’s like asking ISU and Iowa fans to honestly evaluate each other. Won’t happen. However, I can say I’ve heard a TON of Big 12 fans say that ISU fans are some of the best in the league and heard a lot of B1G fans say Iowa fans are pretty bad.
"We're getting drunk today, Rand. Quart of rye each."
by NormanUnderwood on Nov 2, 2011 11:13 PM CDT up reply actions
When Farmageddon week rolls around
your failure to properly despise the Flaw on the Kaw WILL be used against you as evidence of your communism and hatred of America.
Until then, though, you’re still aces.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
Contributor at Bring on the Cats, SBNation's Kansas State blog
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
its like beating up orphan baby kittens - its beyond me
just because I rock, doesn't mean I'm made of stone.
But they're not kittens.
They’re pigeons. Brightly colored pigeons. They shit all over everything, they steal your food when you’re not looking, they carry diseases, and they’re dumb.
The Wiki (I Don't Have a Real Name Yet) -- The Blog (Those Other Guys) -- The Twitter
Contributor at Bring on the Cats, SBNation's Kansas State blog
EDSBS Censor Librorum Promulgatio Media
by jonfmorse on Nov 2, 2011 11:12 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Head coach MOST likely to be a pedophile?
Bret Bielema. Seriously, look at the guy. Is there any way he DOESN’T touch kids?
“Welcome to Uncle Bret’s naked puzzle basement! You won’t wear a shirt and you’ll cry…”
USC knockoff uniforms, none of the results (including probation)
Wide Right & Natty Lite | @widertnattylt
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