(To the Tune of "American Pie")
A long, long time ago
I can still remember
How that music used to make me smile
And I knew if we had that chance
We could make that stadium dance
And maybe we'd go bowling in a while
But then October made us shiver
With every beatdown it delivered
Getting creamed by Aggie
Mizzou leaving for the S-E-C
I can't remember if I cried
When I learned about their doomed plane ride
But something touched me deep inside
The day the BCS died
So bye-bye to the BCS guys
Southern Coaches rigged the vote and Pistol Pete was denied
Senile voters like former Hawkeye George Wine
Are why we should give the Plus-One a Try
Need to give the Plus-One a Try
[Guitar picks up in tempo, gets louder]
Did you read all the SEC love?
How their conference you'll never be above
If Uncle Verne done tells you so
Do you believe in 3 OTs?
Sweet Caroline and a Broken Trophy
And can you teach me how to qualify for a bowl?
Well I know that you're in love with him
Couldn't help but dig that shit-eating grin
He told you he was SO PROUD
Man, I've never heard you get so loud!
(WOOOOOO!)
We were a sad midwestern football joke
4 Touchdown underdogs to the Cowpokes
I realized Chris Christie might be Brady Hoke
The Day the BCS died
They were singing "Bye-bye Mr. BCS Guy"
Computers liked the cowpokes but voter bias was high
Baylor's Heisman means the end might be nigh
Maybe we could give a playoff a try?
A playoff might just be worth a try
The Mizzou game, it would not be shown
So I shelled out 8 bucks for some Clone Zone
but that's not how it used to be
When the Raiders sang for the the Stoops Machine
And a gameplan that looked like Pirate Leach
And while Boomer Sooner looked ahead
The Raiders put their streak to bed
The D-backs had all been burned
The replay was overturned
And while Paul Rhoads read Bill Snyder's guide
We sang Neil Diamond in our minds
The day the BCS died
So Bye Bye Mr. BCS guys
Some of you aren't even smart enough to cook fries
The John Junker case has shined some light on your lies
Turns out some people you just can't buy
So pour another Templeton Rye
Late October, games getting tougher
Strength of schedule starts to make us suffer
4 losses straight and falling faaaaaaast
And then Another Intercepted pass
Jared Barnett got the nod at last
Dropped 40 on the Raiders in a flash
The half-time air was filled with gloom
Down by 10, our bowl game seemed doomed
Some fans still wanted Jantz
Oh, but he never got a chance
As his ankle took the time to heal
The Cyclones, they refused to yield
How did it feel to rush that field?
The Day the BCS died
[chorus]
And there we were all in one space
We won't be Big 12 leftovers again
So come on Joe, Be nimble, Joe, be quick!
JoePa covered for that Sandusky prick
Because silence is the Devil's greatest friend
My hands were clenched in fists of rage
Most wished Joe-Pa well
and hoped Jerry burned in hell
And as more victims came to light
Sought out justice with all their might
I saw Saban laughing with delight
The day the BCS died
[Chorus]
[Tempo slows down, piano tinkles]
He said I needed to finally choose
And I went "ALL IN" on this team that day
I stared up at the new scoreboard
Where I'd heard Sweet Caroline just weeks before
But the Cyclones lost their bowl game anyway
And through the 'net, the games all streamed
The bloggers blogged and B1G got creamed
But few words here were spoken
We'd lost to a team from Hoboken
And the OC I respected most
Got called by Urban and said "I'm toast"
Got called by Urban and said "I'm toast"
An eight minute song makes a long post
The day the BCS died
So Bye Bye to the BCS guys
You can't make the fans all happy now so don't even try
When #2 ends in a 3-way tie
We need to give a play-off a try
We need to give a play-off a try
Bye Bye to the BCS guys
It's amazing just how fast this whole season went by
Here we all sit, filled up with Cyclone Pride
So Let's get drunk on Whiskey and Rye
Let's Get Drunk on Whiskey and Rye
(Thanks again to all our our readers who made the switch over to SBNation this year with us, and to those who were already here and have joined us since. Without you guys, there's no point to any of this absurdity. I'd also like to thank the rest of the WRNL crew for taking a shot on some hack photoshopper and giving me a chance to share my brain droppings with everyone. Happy New Year, everyone!)