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Paul Rhoads Faux Presser: Post-Texas Tech

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Iowa State head coach Paul Rhoads discussed Texas Tech, TCU, and other random crap in a totally real press conference that 100% definitely actually happened.

Kevin Jairaj-USA TODAY Sports

Iowa State coach Paul Rhoads met with the media early this morning to give his thoughts on last weekend's beatdown by the Red Raiders. Rhoads also gave his thoughts on the upcoming game vs. the Christian Horned Frogs from Texas.

On Texas Tech...

"Obviously we're disappointed in the outcome. We told our offense every day in practice last week that we expect them to score more points than Texas Tech, and they didn't."

"Our defense was absolutely great. Exactly what Iowa State football is all about. Our 'Bend But Don't Break' philosophy was shown perfectly throughout the game. Yes, we were bent over, but no one broke a bone doing it. We were just expecting our offense to put up 67 points and that didn't happen."

"As for Cole Netten missing his kick, and just about every other kick he's attempted this year, that's 100% on me. I have a philosophy of 'kick like the world is completely still.' But as Neil deGrasse Tyson kindly pointed out on Twitter last Sunday, Cole and I never even thought about discussing the Earth's rotation. Without Earth's slight tilt, Cole would've made that kick, I have no doubt in my mind."

On The Defense Falling Apart...

"I was proud of our defense. We teach them to treat 3rd and 1 and 3rd and 30 the exact same way. Who cares if they get the first down? Just don't let them score quite yet. So, a lot of people were mad that we gave up that first down on 3rd and forever, but on the sidelines, we were ecstatic, because Texas Tech didn't score!"

"Another thing no one is pointing out is the fact that Tech scored 69 points against UTEP. That's three more than we gave up. That's a major positive, right there. We now know we can go in and really compete and put up a good game with UTEP."

On Texas Tech Coach, Kliff Kingsbury...

"Good looking, if we're in 2014. Gray hair is in... Just ask Bryce Harper."

"We also had a great time in Lubbock partying Friday night. The dude's absolutely crazy, especially when his buddy Steve Sarkisian is in town."

"I can't tell you much about his coaching, though."

On The QB Position...

"Sometimes, things are so bad that you just have to walk away and hope it fixes itself. It's been that way my whole tenure here. Our QB's don't perform well, so we just kind of hope they fix it themselves and focus on more important positions, like headset holder."

"There's most definitely a competition for the #1 spot, but there always is. I just really, really, really like Sam. He's such a nice kid and is really good at running back and forth, which is a must if you want to be a QB behind our line."

On The Run Game...

"We have a great run game. So good, that we are trying to hide it. That's why we don't run so much in games. We're saving it for later in the season when we are 100% eliminated from any postseason contention. That way the fan base will be happy we finished strong and come back positive for next year."

On His Job Security...

"I'll be here next year. Jamie asked me to lose this week and the next couple weeks to try and get hype up for basketball season. If he wouldn't have asked that, I really do think we could've handled Tech, and we'd also give TCU and Baylor a run for their money. But, gotta do what the boss says."

On TCU...

"Honestly, take out Trevone Boykin, and I think we easily beat them by three, maybe even four possessions. But Boykin is so butthurt from us beating him in his first ever start as a QB that we are by far the most important game on the schedule for him. I'm pretty sure every time the schedule comes out, we're the only game he circles. Dude needs to get over it, but whatever he needs to motivate him, I guess."

On His Motorcycle Motto...

"My motorcycle and coaching motto are the exact same. A lot of people are surprised to find out that, despite my love for motorcycles, I've never worked on them in a shop. They are literally the exact same, bike wise, 5-10 years after I buy them. If not worse."

"It's the same in coaching. Why coach players? I recruit them to come here so I don't have to coach them. People say they've seen improvement in Sam Richardson since year one... Well, it's because we recruited him to be who he was in high school!"

"People point out Cole Netten going 11-14 his senior year in high school with a long of 47, and then kicking 11-14 his sophomore year at Iowa State with a long of 47. Yes, those stats are exactly identical."

"I don't change a thing. I recruit them how they are in high school with the hopes that they always stay the same, much like my motorcycles, because if I change anything on them, I could ruin their value. I've tried changing things up a few times here, but it always ends with disaster."

"Quenton Bundrage's ACL last year? I told him to block on a screen pass for once. Same goes for all those O-line injuries over the years... You think those happen by coincidence? When our guys actually try to block people, they get hurt. Better to not try and stay healthy than give it our all and get hurt."