We fine, outstanding moral citizens at WRNL recently saw the list of activities suggested by the VEISHEA task force and were taken aback by the overall lameness of the proposed replacements for the former student-run celebration.
Because of this, we decided to take it upon ourselves to generate a BETTER list of things that Iowa State University students could do during the school year to celebrate the privilege of being an ISU underclassman.
WRNL plans on submitting the following list to the VEISHEA task force for consideration. We feel that this list better represents the spirit and tradition that accompanied VEISHEA before it was done away with.
5. Midnight run from Curtiss to Beardshear with a Super Dog eating contest halfway!
A great ice breaker to start the celebrating! Students will work in some cardio and eat some delicious processed meat along the way!
4. Drunk paintball in the library!
Get blasted in more than one way in this fun activity used to promote Parks Library! Are ISU students not taking advantage of everything the library has to offer? Get them in the door with some fun paintballing action, sponsored by Fireball whiskey!
3. Symbolic burning of tires at midfield of Jack Trice Stadium!
Everyone knows our football team’s performances often end up looking like a giant flaming tire fire. It’s time to embrace it and start loving ISU football for what it truly is! Join in as hundreds of tires are piled into a heap at the center of Jack Trice Stadium, then take part as everyone in the student body sings Kumbaya with the scorched rubber warming their faces! Don’t forget, beer will be sold in the BRAND NEW Sukup End Zone Club! Gotta make a profit, right JP?
2. VEISHEA memorial riot decathlon!
To really capture the spirit of VEISHEA (RIP), students will split into teams and take part in the inaugural riot decathlon! Events include dumpster fire races, light post ripping, stop sign javelin, goalpost teardowns, car flipping, cow tipping and MORE!
1. Tailgate Tom Hill’s retirement party!
It's BYOB at the Tom Hill retirement party tailgate! Grab your favorite booze and send out the man who's been trying to kill VEISHEA for almost two decades!