The WRNL Hotbox: The Bowlsby's!

Hello and welcome to the The Bowlsby's - the premier Oscar® inspired Big XII Award show on the internet!  And if you are here for your regularly scheduled programming, I apologize.  The Bowlsby's are ratings click gold.  Can't pass that up.  The Hotbox will get to some of your old questions next week.  And of course if you want to ask the Hotbox anything new this week, eat those comments up.  But I digress.  This year, The Bowlsby's will be hosted by yours truly - The Hotbox.  It's an honor.  SO PROUD.  But  I know you are all expecting a very funny and long monologue to kick things off.  But unfortunately for you, there will be no monologue.  This article will be just as long and drawn out as any other awards show so let's get down to handing out the hardware.  There will be no winners for "Best Sound Editing" or any shit like that.  Those awards are stupid and no one cares and I don't have enough effort creativity to come up with winners for every damn award.  We're sticking with the MAJOR AWARDS.  Sorry to all those "Best Documentary - Short Subject" aficionado's out there.  To the Bowlsby's!

Best Costume Design

I know I just said we're going to stick with just the MAJOR AWARDS here.  But "Best Costume Design" is actually relevant here.  This will be between the teams in the Big XII with the best jerseys.  This will be a hotly debated topic down in the comments.  Everyone has their own preference for colors, style, brand, bias, etc.  But this is the Bowlsby's - where we take something completely subjective and crown someone the best.

The nominees are:

The Baylor Bears

The Kansas Jayhawks

The Oklahoma State Cowboys

This is a battle between two Adidas schools and one Nike school.  Adidas goes a good job or getting their basketball stuff noticed.  Remember the sleeves, zubaz, and/or highlighter colors?  Boldness gets the Academy's attention.  It also got the Hotbox's attention.  Okie State gets the nod for the Nike schools sheerly because it has a better color scheme to work with.

But the Bowlsby goes to...

The Kansas  Jayhawks

God I want to burn myself for posting this picture.  But just look at those jerseys...

Best Supporting Actor

This award will go to the most important player for a team who is not the main guy.  This guy doesn't usually put up the most points on the team.  He is out there to give the team a second deadly weapon, either on offense or defense.  But If this guy performs, his team is usually in a great position to succeed.

The nominees are:

Anthony Hickey - OSU

Monte Morris - ISU

Jameel McKay - ISU

Ryan Spangler - OU

Devin Williams - WVU

Rico Gathers - BU

This is a very competitive and tough group.  Sometimes they do lead their team in one way or another, but they for the most part are not seen as the go to guy.  And PERCEPTION IS EVERYTHING.  The Academy probably snubbed a few players because it's always soooo political.  The people who go and get the word out and campaign for that coveted Bowlsby seem to always win.  IT'S JUST NOT FAIR.  This is exactly what the KU fans are saying about this.  Well they got snubbed because I have no idea who their supporting guy is.  Hell, who is their main guy even?  Ellis?  Oubre?  Seldon?  No idea.  They are all supporting the supporter.  No nominations for them.  But the team who went out and did the most campaigning was Iowa State...it may or may not be because I watch all of their games.  But either way it worked.

The Bowlsby goes to...

Monte Morris - ISU

pic.twitter.com/7R3n8Oqj9F

— Monte Man-Man Morris (@MonteMorris11) February 19, 2015

Some from around the league may have a gripe with this.  They may claim that Monte is Iowa State's main guy for many games.  And this may be true.  But I don't care.  Niang is still considered The Dude for this team.  So the homer pick goes to Monte!

Best Actor

This award is essentially the Big XII MVP award.  This is the guy the Best Supporting Actor is supporting so he can ball the hell out.  Not much explanation needed here.

The nominees are:

Buddy Hield - OU

Le'Bryan Nash - OSU

Phil Forte - OSU

Juwan Staten - WVU

Georges Niang - ISU

Kenny Chery - BU

First off, you can see there are yet again no Kansas players nominated.  You might be asking yourself, "How can the team leading the league not have a player nominated for Best Supporting Actor OR Best Actor?"  Again, I have no idea who even is The Dude for them.  Second off, there are two Okie State players listed here.  They are both equally considered The Dude for them and are both in the top three in scoring in the Big XII.  That had a lot to do with it.  The rest are The Dude's for their respective teams in the top half of the league.  Well, maybe minus Kenny Chery.  Whatever.

The Bowlsby goes to...

Buddy Hield - OU

This award may be foolish to hand out before the season comes to its conclusion but the Oscars® are on Sunday so fuck it.  Buddy Hield has been the best player in the conference and has OU very near the top of the standings.  That's why he wins.  If say, Iowa State somehow finds a way to win the conference then I suspect Georges Niang would have had a lot to do with that.  So he might win in that scenario.  Or if West Virginia starts burning every couch they see the rest of the way, then Juwan Staten might have gotten the Golden Bowlsby.  But up to this point Buddy Hield has been The Dude.  Do what you wish with your Bowlsby, Buddy.  You've earned it.

Best Director

This Bowlsby will go the man who has directed his team with the most grace and success.  Some might call this the Coach of the Year Award.  But this is the Bowlsby's so we're sticking with this whole Oscar® schtick.

The nominees are:

Bill Self - KU

Fred Hoiberg - ISU

Lon Kruger - OU

Travis Ford - OSU

Scott Drew - BU

Bob Huggins - WVU

These are all the coaches minus the bottom three in the conference.  Those three either have not very good teams or just have driven their potentially great team into the ground.  The nominees however have their various reasons for making the list.  Either they have showed great consistency, have been better than their pre-conference coaches projection (I WONDER WHO THAT IS), flat out better than expected, or have just been doing more with less.  It's quite the thing that Travis Ford and Scott Drew got a nomination here.  We all hate on them for their interesting coaching techniques, but for the most part have exceeded expectations this year.  If the Bowlsby's would have been a week or two earlier, one of those dufuses would have won this award.

The Bowlsby goes to...

Bob Huggins - WVU

Oh boy, what an upset!  As mentioned above, Travis Ford and Scott Drew had a solid lead in this category up until just recently.  Huggy Bear is not leading the Big XII by any means (unless you're talking about long, pissed off stares) but has his team pressing the Virginia out of people.  His squad lost many key members over the offseason and was mostly pegged to do poorly this year.  But Huggy sweared at his youngsters to PRESS and FOUL and PRESS and FOUL just enough to make them buy into the concept.  It's mostly worked so far.  Look out for #PressVirginia the rest of the way Big XII.

Best Picture

What a year in the Big XII.  So many great good teams to be remembered.  Truly, a year that will be celebrated for the ages.  This award will go to the best team in the Big XII (so far).

The nominees are:

The Kansas Jayhawks

The Iowa State Cyclones

The Oklahoma Sooners

The Academy has started nominating however many movies they feel is necessary into this category.  There is no set amount or limit now.  So the Bowlsby's are going to do the same.  There are a few more teams who could possibly end up the winner of this great conference but in all actuality, it just feels like one of the three nominees will pull it out.

The Bowlsby goes to...

ALL THREE

THIS IS THE ONLY WAY THIS COULD END.