The WRNL Hotbox

ROAD DAWGS!  KU KEEPS LOSING!  COURT STORMING HOT TAKES!  BIG XII TITLE HERE WE COME!  OH, NO.  THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS.

Cyclone Nation has been on a roller coaster of emotions this past week.  All the momentum seemingly had swung onto Iowa State's side heading into the friendly confines of Hilton Coliseum against Baylor.  And then...*FART NOISE*.  It was actually quite bizarre.  Iowa State had built up a seven point lead, and Scott Drew had just out Scott Drew'd himself by calling his last timeout with eight minutes left.  Things seemed like they were going exactly according to plan.  Then it happened.  Baylor made FIVE STRAIGHT THREE'S IN FIVE STRAIGHT POSSESSIONS.  That's batshit y'all.  Yes, we could have played better defense.  But when is that not the case?  But Baylor made the shots when they really needed them.  Give credit where credit is due, even if it was batshit.  And yes, it was very disappointing to see Iowa State squander yet another opportunity. This is why the whole "woe is me" attitude perpetuates itself throughout the fan base.  We are constantly in fear of the that dreaded "kick to the stones" moment that always brings us back to Earth to our knees.  But there are more important games ahead and now is not the time to linger on a few minutes of batshit basketball and sore balls.  It's the time of year where you need to ice your bag and prepare for the next swift kick.  Hopefully it doesn't happen, but safety first.  Then teamwork.

PREDICTION REVIEW TIME:

Two weeks ago the Hotbox put it's credibility on the line and predicted this:

WVU - Win

@OSU - Win

@Texas - Loss

Baylor - Win

@Kansas State - Win

Oklahoma - WIn

@TCU - Win

That's a pretty sunshiney prediction right there.  But I'm sure there's plenty of you out thee who are wondering, "Why did the Hotbox predict us to lose to the confounding dumpster fire that is Texas?"  My simple answer is, "Because it's a Cyclone thing."  We will play and win at OSU and everyone will be pumping all the sunshine and then we will go down to Texas and lose a close one.  It will turn out to be the biggest what-if of the season for reasons you can all infer on your own.

Well there you go Cyclone Nation.  The Hotbox was wrong.  Sorta.  The Hotbox got the team wrong, but the reaction was spot on.  Granted, that reaction probably would have happened after any loss.  But it just feels worst since it happened at home.  UGH.  Let's hope the Hotbox bats 1.000 from here on out.

To the boxHot:

CornFedIABoy:

Now that the "ISU sucks on the road" narrative is dead (OkSU) and buried (Texas), what’s the media’s next knock on ISU going to be? Back to the "don’t play defense" or "still have to prove themselves in the Tournament"?

The media's next knock on ISU?  "ISU CAN'T WIN AT HOME.  HILTON HOUSE OF HORRORS.  IS FRED HOIBERG GOING TO THE NBA?"  These seem about right.  Oh and definitely back to the "don't play defense" narrative until a team decides to not make 10+ three's on us.  Hopefully we can get back on the "WILL ISU WIN OUT?" train again though.  Remember those days?  Things were simpler back then...

TheBringerBacker:

Dear Hotbox:

1. ISU plays UNI on neutral ground. What happens?

2. Nader: love him or hate him? Maybe a little indifferent? People seem to really despise his game or feel he needs more minutes. Settle the debate once and for all.

3. Hoiberg leaves for the NBA (I know, crying) who would you want to replace him? Be realistic.

THREE QUESTIONS?  A bit needy are we?

1.  Since playing UNI didn't happen in this regular season, let's envision a scenario where ISU and UNI somehow play in the NCAA tournament.  First off, that would be crazy and the entire state would stop for two hours.  Second off, I honestly don't want any part of that.  All the pressure would be on Iowa State and we would have everything to lose.  It's just like losing that first game of every football season.  Picture that (shouldn't be too hard), times 4059849058.  The pain and anguish and shame and ridicule would be unprecedented.  No bueno.

Whatever give me Iowa State in a game that will stop my heart.

2.  I guess it depends on the game for me.  If it is on the road or we need an extra ball handler?  I'm all about some Nader.  If it is neither of those?  He seems to disappear with all this shots seemingly to be just long or going in and out.  It's frustrating.  But we definitely need him in those pressure situations.  So play him as needed.  Just as Dreamy does.

3.  For the record, he isn't going anywhere.  But if the Hotbox got to hand pick a replacement?  The Godfather -  LARRY EUSTACHY. Haha kidding.  Sorta.  But the only person who comes to mind is Archie Miller of Dayton.  He made an Elite 8 run last year and has a very small and depleted team in contention for the tourney again this year.  Other that that, I have no idea.  Nor do I want to have a clue.  DREAMY FOREVER.

graphikdeCYner:

This is my first submission seeking a small snippet from your endless depths of wisdom.

I’m going to be turning 25 in May, which is a pretty major birthday for anyone let alone a lady such as myself. I can already feel the effects of what I’ll describe as "post college" instead of the more offensive "getting old". Take today as an example—I’m fighting off a pretty monstrous hangover while attempting to act natural at work. Hangovers were formerly beasts of myth for me and I have to say that I am ill prepared to ride into battle and defeat one. What are some tips for combating a hangover while trapped in a workplace environment?

I also find that I am much more content to stay in on the couch with my dog and boyfriend (or my boyfriend and his cat, if we’re over at his place) than college-me would have found permissible. Do you have any good Netflix suggestions or alternative "going out" activities that don’t involve heavy drinking on Welch five nights of the week?

In closing, I find that I am not prepared for turning 25. What advice do you have for aging gracefully?

THREE MORE QUESTIONS?!?  The neediness is bleeding through my screen.

But I feel ya girlfriend.  I'm in the same exact boat as you.  Post-college, trying to find meaning in life and stave off the freedom sucking force that is the Real World.  Drinking has gone down, but when you do, you make sure to make it worth it.  So sometimes you have to go out on a weeknight.  But my first tip?  Don't do that.  But if you absolutely have to go out on a weeknight?  Here are some ways to survive the Work Hangover:

• Coffee
• Grease
• Water
• Coffee

*TAKE COFFEE INDUCED BOOZE DUMP*

• Food
• Coffee

As for some Netflix suggestions?  You can find a few good movies and there is always a good documentary out there if you are into that sorta thing.  But If you are into binge watching?  Oh boy, does the Hotbox have a suggestion for you.  House of Cards Season 3 comes out TODAY.  WATCH IT ALL.  Being social will always take a backseat to House of Cards.  Human people suck.

And aging gracefully?  First off, don't watch Cyclone Athletics.  But I'm probably not the best person to ask since I look years older than I actually am.  I just lived hard, man.  But I do workout and TRY to eat healthy-ish.  Just do that.  Or don't.  Whatever.

alangrayhawk:

Who would win if they played against each other:

2013-2014 ISU mens basketball team that won the Big 12 tournament but lost to the eventual NCAA champions UCONN.

or

1999-2000 ISU mens basketball team that won the regular season Big 12 and Big 12 Tournament but lost to the eventual NCAAchampions of Michigan State.

Each team has the coach from that time frame. Who do you have and why?

This is another interesting what-if Cyclone fantasy sports scenario.  But as with any fantasy sports scenario that involves time travel, you always lean toward the older team.  This is probably because there is always a metric ton of nostalgia associated with them.  And this is no exception.  I was quite young and impressionable back then so according to me, that 2000 team is unbeatable.  Fizer and Tinsley would make this current squad's defense look even more suspect.  And hell, they might be able to slow down Dreamy's offense.  BLASPHEMY?

bvfour3:

How much money would it take for you to get slapped by this guy?

Note: After some research this event, unsurprisingly, took place in Lubbock

Sooo this took place in Lubbock.  Color me shocked.  And how much money would I need to take part in an open-hand slapping competition with this fine gentleman?  $50 bucks would probably do it.  I would do it for such a low figure because the Hotbox has been itching to get involved in Lubbock's Underground Slap Club.  Sometimes a good slap just makes you feel alive, ya know?  But we need to set a few ground rules.  First off, no participant can wear any tape or watch on their slap wrist like this bozo.  No Performance Enhancing Braces.  Second, no hats can be worn by the slapee like this jabroni.  This introduces an unnecessary injury risk.  And finally, we need some sort of mat or cushion in case their is a Slap-Out like there is here.  Gotta make Slap Club as safe as possible!

CYnative:

Oh great and powerful Hotbox,

How does Deonte Burton contribute to the team next year, he seems quite the tweener based on his physical stats?

Mr. Burton is not all that tall in basketball terms.  But he certainly makes up for it with his bulk and shear anger with the rim. He will be a hybrid guard/forward slasher type.  If we need a strong body to match up with the opponents big guy, I reckin he could.  And probably post up on a smaller guard if he decides to test his fate.  But most of the time he will be cutting to the hoop looking to hurt someone.  I can get down with that.

eastside cy:

Velveeta Shells and Cheese or Kraft blue box Original mac and cheese? Homemade (while clearly superior) is not an option.

My whole life, I was raised on the Original Kraft Macaroni and Cheese.  I rarely ate the Velveeta Shells version, but when I did I felt so naughty.  I felt like I was cheating with the kinky girl who does the butt stuff your wife refuses to do.  This Velveeta Mac has just so much more creamy, cheesy, and NEW.  It felt so right.  BUT SO WRONG.  I eventually came to my senses and decided that a few fun times with Velveeta was not worth jeopardizing my life with Kraft Mac.  Kraft Mac is where my heart lies.

Tracks182:

Do we get Diallo?

If yes, how long does he play, what kind of impact does he have, and what kind of rosterbation lineup do we roll with?

Time to pump some of that warm, hearty sunshine.  The Hotbox says YES.  I'm sure he is being told that he could be a one and done player.  But for some reason I get the impression he could stay for two.  He is still "raw" and two years with Dreamy could do wonders.  I think his impact would be very similar to McKay's being that the have very similar games.  And if he has anywhere close to the same impact as McKay, I think we would smile.  Does Dreamy start McKay and Diallo?  That would be amazing but would go against some of the principles of Hoiball.  So I think Hoiball evolves into something else.  Something unfathomable.

YoungAndTroubled:

Sorry I was gone living my life.

I’m gone for 2 weeks and I come back to the top post being about some kid who watches Netflix? YOU ARE ALL MESSING THIS UP..

Alright everyone lets talk about some cyclone football… Lol JK.. I’ll likely go to church more days this year than I’ll go to Jack Trice.

Let’s get to it. I’m young and troubled and I don’t have time to pick my favorite cyclone players for a video game (the Greek and Tavon Sledge are my picks just in case you were wondering).

Hotbox. I have a new crush. Hannah Davis. I’ve known a Hannah or two in my life, but have you seen this babe? SI cover model.. BUT.. Hannah Davis is the lover to none other than the Jetes.. Yeah Jetes yeah.. Derek Jeter. You wanna talk about a babe.. Let’s talk about Derek Jeter. Can you even fathom how many women wanted a gift basket from Jetes after his game at Yankee stadium? So I gotta ask.. Who’s got the better eyes.. My boy Jetes, or Fred Hoiberg?

Final thought. All anybody ever posts on this are GIFS. TRY HARDER.

Oh shit, YoungAndTroubled is back and taking shots at our loyal readers!  I'm sure that's gonna end well for him.  And for you layman's out there, here is the story he is referring to about JEETS*.  How very nice of JEETS.  If someone ever gave me a gift basket after a one night stand, I'd immediately fall in love right there.  I'm easy, ladies.  But to your question.  I'm gonna decide the winner of the Better Eyes competetion by who has the most relevant nickname.  JEETS is a great nickname, but doesn't make me swoon over his eyes.  Now DREAMY on the other hand....I get lost in his eyes just typing that name.

"Knowing too much of your future is never a good thing,"

-Rick Riordan