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The WRNL Hotbox

You have questions? We have opinions.

Unless you were lost in a frozen dream state or high in an opium den (which is probably the same thing), you probably knew that the pinnacle event of College Basketball starts tomorrow.  The Final Four!  I was really hoping a certain team that I have a fancy for would be participating.  I even predicted it.  Oh, you want to hear me blab about how my bracket went?  I'll tell you about it because people who talk about their bracket unsolicited are the BEST.  The Hotbox correctly picked 3 out of the 4 teams with Kentucky, Wisconsin, and Michigan State.  Not bad!  But you could probably guess who my other pick was.  I don't even have to say it.  I don't want to say it.  If that certain team would be participating I would probably be elected President right then and there.  Having picked all the correct teams in the Final Four, have AMAZING hair, tall, handsome, charming, and incredibly popular.  BAM, President time.  But alas, that certain team stepped on their weiners and I'm still not President.  The shame.

Enjoy the games y'all.



Diallo Prognostication:

Is it safe to assume that Diallo is currently just waiting to see which players at the schools on his short list are going announce for the draft? My expectation right now is that he’s watching Lyles and Poythress at UK and Perry Ellis at KU. My current hypothesis on orders of likelihood is if both Poythress and Lyles leave UK that’s where he goes, else if Ellis leaves KU he goes there, or if only one of Lyles and Poythress leaves UK he’s there. The only way he comes to ISU is if all three of those players stay in school. St Johns and Pitt on his list are red herrings.

Diallo has been a hot topic in the Hotbox since its inception.  And I'm more than willing to answer every last one of these questions.  And fun fact: on Wednesday he was the MVP of the McDonald's All-American game. But the Hotbox thinks he is just waiting as long as possible so he can gather as much information as possible.  And yes, a lot of that information is seeing what other players are going to do.  I'm pretty sure Lyles is gone to the NBA, but not so sure about Poythress though.  He messed up his knee pretty bad and hasn't played most of the year.  He could obviously do the Nerlens Noel thing and go and get drafted high anyways, but I'm not so sure.

Kansas already has a commit from fellow big man, Carlton Bragg, and I don't know if Ellis staying or going will matter in his decision.  But now to St. Johns.  Everyone thought he was just keeping a hometown school on his list just because.  But St. Johns has decided to be posers and copy everything Iowa State basketball is about.  They hired Chris Mullin who is a former NBA player, a white front office guy, shooting genius, zero experience coaching, and now has Matt Abdelmassih as assistant coach and recruiting ace.  St. Johns just made a power move on Diallo and this scares the Hotbox.  Hopefully the Dreamiest factor will outweigh everything those posers now have on the table.  Hopefully.


Dear Hotbox,

The spring game is quickly approaching, do I pack my fire extinguisher, or simply bring a spare tire and a bag of mallows?

Football questions?  UGH.  I guess I should embrace the idea of answering these since it's the offseason again.

I've been to one Spring Game in my life and I actually quite enjoyed it.  It was my senior year, and got to see A.J. Klein house a pick while drinking snuck in Busch Light.  So I had that going for me, which was nice.  But to your question.  If you are really going to the Spring Game, please tailgate.  It's the only reason to go.  Spring Games are stupid otherwise, especially this year.  All the plays are scripted and you "get" to watch the 1's play the 2's and this proves nothing.  It's like watching Iowa State play Toledo.  Literally.  It makes you feel all good inside that we can beat up on somebody but deep down you know it's all a worthless sham.  But at least we don't have to pay $500K to do it though.


Which Basketball newcomer (or person who improves the most ie. Greek, Nader, Thomas) should I expect to be the most impressed with next year (Lets include Diallo is here, because Fuck Kentucky)?

If Diallo decides on Dreamy then Diallo is the answer.  But see above for all your Diallo needs.  So I'll use this question for everyone else besides him.  First off, not sure how Nader and Thomas are "basketball newcomers" since they both played extensively off the bench.  I guess you could say the Greek is new, but he won't be seeing much more playing time than he did this year.  With all the talent on next year's team I just don't see it happening.  But I've said this before and I'll say it again, I think Darien Williams is gonna be that guy.  He's tall, super athletic, and can shoot.  I like that.


You're Jamie Pollard.

The hype train for football is at full speed. Our asses are overflowing with all the sunshine that’s been pumped into them during summer camp.

The OLine looks great, the defense has come together and has some confidence with a fresh group of Jucos that are exceeding expectations, SR is throwing lasers to our kick ass receiving group, the stadium is freshly pimped out and ready for some action.

Then UNI shows up and beats us again. How do you react to this unfortunate and very cycloney event?

Well, my (not JP's) initial reaction would be to fire CPR.  But firing a coach one week into a season does nobody any good.  So that's when you go back to hyping the new stadium and atmosphere and everything else not football related.  If I were the AD I probably would have moved on this offseason, mostly because of the all the recruits who flipped on us.  But that's not what happened.  So if we lose to UNI, I would see how the team responds in the next few weeks and go from there.  If canning the head coach could salvage a couple wins somehow, I'm all for it.


Dearest Box of Hotness,

Why is it the Big 12 seems to fare poorly in the NCAA tournament lately? Is it because we’re beat up from our conference grind, or the officiating allows B1G style "defense? Or are we statistically doing fine and I just think we're doing poorly because the media tells me so?

I'll hang up and listen.

It's mostly because the Big XII just hasn't had any "great" teams the last couple of years.  And we seem to have a habit of getting in our own way.  We lose to much higher seeded teams.  We have "One True Champion".  We have Texas.  It's impossible to ever meet expectations especially when you try your hardest to screw yourself over.  I'm still somehow thankful we're not the B1G.  They can eat a mayonnaise sandwich.


What will be we ranked going into next season?  Also, chances the football team actually makes a bowl game?

Many of the prognosticators are saying Iowa State basketball will be top 10 next year.  Maybe even top 5 if we get Diallo.  But since the people who vote on all that shit will think Iowa State is Iowa State we will probably be like 11th and everyone's butts will fall off.  Or they will be ranked 9th and everyone will jump into a volcano thinking that the 9 spot is cursed.  So my guess is officially 9th.

Bowl game?  1%.  Unless they add like 12 bowls and we can all drive to Butte, Montana for the Cici's Pizza Bowl presented by the Double Eagle Casino.  SUNSHINE.


Almighty Hotbox:

3sus has been struck down.  Can you reassure #cyclONEnation that 3sus will rise again?

3sus played on a bum hip for like the last month of the season.  And now we know that 3sus performed the miracle of not feeling pain during that whole time.  We witnessed that miracle.  Be blessed that 3sus blessed us with his public displays of miracle working.  But now 3sus must rest.  Even God needed a day of rest, so he isn't really going off script here.  3sus will rise again.  But season.  Shit.

"Opinion is the medium between knowledge and ignorance."