The WRNL Hotbox

THE HOTBOX IS BACK.  Well, it was only a week absence but I'm back and missed y'all degenerates.  My presence on this blog has seemingly gotten less and less over the past couple months and the Hotbox apologizes.  I know I'm a huge celebrity to all you fanboys and girls so I know your souls are hurting.  But the reason for my fashionable lateness and absences is that I'M WORKING TO SUPPORT MY HABIT COLLEGE DEBT.  This new job requires me to actually do...like work.  It's bullshit.  I got real good at sitting at a cubicle and surfing the web and shootin' the shit with you buttsnorts.  A pro's pro really.  But now, I can't sit on my ass and do nothing all day anymore.  HOW IS A BLOGGER SUPPOSED TO BLOG WITHOUT HIS ASS AND THE INTERNET?!?  If you have any ideas let me know.

Nonetheless, just a few things have happened since the last Hotbox.  Noskowiak committed to Team Dreamy.  Diallo went to Kansas (FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK), the NFL Draft was as boring as a highly anticipated event can get - scratch that - the May/Pac fight was actually the pinnacle of how boring a highly anticipated event can get.  And how can I forget that a horse ran in a circle and people pretended to care.  Riveting stuff.

Let's just get dry that Box out and heat it up:

Bryclone,

Two part question:

1. How many commitments do we get for basketball after this weekend?

2. Why do we have to suck at football recruiting?  Do we have anyone committed to us?

I love the enthusiasm Bryclone, but this a three part question.  JEEZ.  But since you asked this question two weeks ago, I somehow know the exact answer to your question.  The Hotbox is all knowing.  I'm gonna say ISU gets one recruit.  My Box is tingling and telling me that this recruit is a point guard.  And white.  Yes, yes it's coming to me now....it starts with a Ma...Mi...no.  It's more of a Na...Ni...Nick.  Nick Noskowiak!  Yes, that's it!  He will be our lone basketball commit last week.  BOOK IT.

And why do we suck at football recruiting?  Because we suck at football.  Which is all because of socio-economic and geographical reasons.  And bad coaching.  Fix these very complex issues and you will solve Iowa State Football and win the Nobel Peace Prize.  And do we have anyone committed to us?  Fuck if I know.  Ask KnowDan.  But I do know that no "big" names like Lazard came this year.  Or any year besides last year.  Just accept that football is Iowa State Athletic's dick and we will always be stepping on it.  Moving on.

Speaking of dicks...

KnowDan,

Dear Caja Caliente,

Al disfrutar de un tiempo a solas muy necesario hacer prefiere ir con el método probado y verdadero bajo cuerda o el método menos utilizado, pero igualmente agradable, encima de la cabeza?

I originally decided to respond to KnowDan in the comment section:

The Cydeliner:

Tried and true.

But sometimes I use my left.

KnowDan:

Answer it next week asshole.

And be more creative than that.

Well, shit.  Can't piss off Boss Man - better do what he says.  So if you don't speak Spanish, go get Rosetta Stone, learn the entire language, and try again.  You'll be a little more clued in on what's going on here.

But anyways, my response still stands.  Most of the time, using the Tried and True is most efficient and utilitarian way to keep everything in check.  It's not preferable to do this, but sometimes you just gotta keep everything operational so the business stays afloat.  I'VE GOT A LIFE TO LIVE YOU KNOW.  But other times the business is safely in the black and you have a little something extra to throw at Employee Appreciation Day.  The Employee really appreciates the gesture but things always turn out to be a little awkward in the Break Room, so you return to your desk and go back to what you know.  The Tried and True.

HOW'S THAT FOR CREATIVE KNOWDAN?!?!?

McBlog,

Chicken Wings

I don’t think they need their own contest, mostly b/c Jethros BBQ Rub wings are the best wings anywhere IMO. I’ve tried their other flavors too and they have plenty of good options but the BBQ Rub could be the greatest wing on earth.

There is no real question or submission here.  I just included because YOU PEOPLE love debating all things food.  Plus, I needed more material.  But being that the Hotbox has never had Jethro's wings, I can't pass judgement here.  The Hotbox does prefer Caribbean Jerk and Parm/Gar from BDubs.  Now slash each other's throats in the comments.

isudrummer,

ISU over/under on wins is 4.5 next year (just my own number I am setting)

Do you take the over or the under?  Who do you think the wins are going to come against?

UNDERUNDERUNDERUNDERUNDERUNDERUNDERUNDER.

These are all going to be wrong cause PSSHHHH FOOTBALL WHO CARES AMIRIGHT???

They get UNI, Toledo, and/or Kansas/Texas Tech.  Whatever.

Val_Venis,

All Knowing Hotbox,

Please run down your top 5 public golf courses in Des Moines, in order.  Your wiseness will shore up all debates I have with others on this topic.

The Hotbox has grown very fond of golf over the years.  The Hotbox is also very fond of telling you truths that can no longer be discussed or debated.  These are truths and no one can dispute these.  Ames is being included in this because I said so.  To the Big Board:

5. Cheapest Thing Available - Somewhere Close

Sometimes you just wanna go out and play for as little as possible.  Golf is an expensive game.  Use GolfNow.com.

4. Beaver Creek - Grimes

27 holes to choose from and the East and West course are very manageable.  Test your luck on the South course and have your spirit broken.  Cheap weekday golf.

3. Veenker - Ames

Wonderful course that is run by ISU.  Golf is relatively cheap because you know, it's run by ISU.

2. Honey Creek - Boone

The back nine at this course might be one of most beautiful things you can see at a public golf course here in Iowa.

1. Otter Creek - Ankeny

Probably the nicest course public course I've played in the area.  I would have never played here if it weren't for GolfNow.com.  Got some cheap golf at not a cheap golf place.  YOU SHOULD DO IT TOO.

TheBringerBacker,

Will Monte Morris make the Pan-American Team?

If you don't know what the hell TheBringerBacker is talking about here, the Pan-Am games are like the Olympics for the America's...for college kids.  And if it truly is a collection of college basketball players, hell yes he better be on that team.  He is the best point guard in the country and that spot is rightfully his.  Melo Trimble needs to learn his place.

"Knowledge is good"

Emil Faber