Thursday afternoon Steve Prohm let it drop that he's stopped using Twitter and Facebook due to an increasing amount of fan criticism directed at him. While Jamie Pollard tried to teach Coach Prohm his time-tested strategy of blocking anyone and everyone who annoys him, we're on the way to convincing the Iowa State Athletic department that letting us run his account for a day was a much better idea. We've selected a few tweets to respond to on behalf of Prohm.
Let's start with something relatively tame.
Thanks, Mr. TOPO. I truly appreciate you tagging myself and the entire team with your plea to play defense. This is something that I have never noticed, and surely thousands of fans at Hilton Coliseum have never noticed, so it's wonderful that you've taken the time to point this out.
Jimmy, it's been 16 games. I only wish I had the power to destroy a program so quickly. Also, enjoy your blocking from Jamie Pollard.
I can only assume both you and Jimmy are 6 years old and are unaware of the Greg McDermott era. Do your parents know you're on Twitter?
As much as I'd like to literally run onto the court and strangle Abdel when he takes a contested fadeaway jumper early in the shot clock, there are some things that are out of my control, just like the buddies in your profile picture teabagging you after you pass out is out of your control.
Thank you for complimenting my jawline. You can't lift good genetics.
Your face makes me want to punch puppies.
#BlameProhm is the new #BlameObama. Let's get it trending, Cyclone fans.
Eight unanswered tweets at me in one day? I'd hate to see what happens when a woman doesn't text you back.
Oh, never mind.
We hope we've made a good case for running your social media, Coach Prohm, but if not, don't worry, because boss man J-Peezy's never afraid to lay a pimp hand to your haters.