Ross Peterson is Talkin' Bout the 'Clones

Those of you that listen to Des Moines, drive time sports radio likely heard a rant by Ross Peterson on yesterday's KXNO Sports Fanatics show. If you haven't, you can listen to the podcast here. It's toward the end of hour one.

Our friend, @TedFlintKansas was kind enough to transcribe this rant so we could take a closer look. In fairness to Ross, this all came about because a caller (Greg) called in and was trolling about attendance at Carver Hawkeye this year, and how that would translate to Wells Fargo for this year's NCAA Tournament, should the Hawkeyes be slated there.

Any rational fan knows that tickets would be hard to come by if ANY Iowa team were to be sent there. Let alone a likely 1 or 2-seeded Hawks team with a large alumni base and fan support in the Des Moines area. It was a hack troll job, and they let Greg go on too long. But, you know what? I think that was intentional.

Once Greg started trolling, Ross started formulating this rant in his head, you know the one. The rant full of Hawk fan douchebaggery attempting to put every Iowa State fan back in their place. Instead of cutting off the troll that doesn't at all represent the viewpoint of the Iowa State fan base, he was allowed to continue until Ross was ready to go on his condescending rant that typifies why so many Cyclone fans have such disdain for Hawkeye fans.

Let's take a closer look. This first exchange is the calm before the storm.

Caller (Greg): How many people are camping in Tents to get into Carver?
Ross Peterson (RP): That is because the U of I doesn't screw the students like Iowa State. The guy is asking a question that is the reason why. You want to know why people aren't camping out. There is a very real reason. They have to at Iowa State because the University screws the students.
Chris Williams (CW): Well there is demand.
Greg: Or, or they aren't supporting the team because they don't think it is a big deal.
RP: Tell yourself that Greg.

Well look at you, pretending to know what you're talking about. I could throw some ClonesJer attendance numbers at you, like the fact that Iowa State has had 1,500 total unfilled seats on the season while Iowa is averaging  2,150 vacant seats PER GAME. But that's not the point. I want to focus on the "Iowa State screws the students" bit.

Camping out is commonplace for quality basketball programs. Students famously camp out to get better seats in various forms at Kansas, Duke, Michigan State and many others. Perhaps you don't understand that because being a quality basketball program is a concept unfamiliar to you.

You seem to think that students are forced to stay out there for a week. Wrong. Perhaps this article, written by some actual fans that were in line, could help you understand. I'm going to focus on some comments from @_AlexGookin to help you understand a bit more.

I stood in line at noon on game day of the No. 1 Oklahoma game and was 8th row. Waiting for 5 hours outside in sub-zero temps and another 3 inside to watch Iowa State upset a No. 1 team for the first time in Hilton history was more worth it than I can put into words.

Boy, it really sounds like he got the shaft there!

...There were beer pong tables, foosball tables, card games, music, €”everything you see at a tailgate, but with tents instead of cars. Random strangers brought food, Coach Campbell brought hot chocolate, Hy-Vee catered free beef stew, multiple times the basketball team itself has come and served pizza and even the local police department has brought food and drink. After practice one night, some basketball players (namely, Georges) went around Tent City knocking on peoples tents and asking if they wanted to do photo-ops. The local news channels and even ESPN absolutely love doing stories on Tent City. Outside of cold conditions, there is seriously nothing that a college kid wouldn't enjoy about Tent City and it blows my mind there are people who doubt that.

OH NO! Students voluntarily camping had a great time, got some free food, met some coaches and players and got some camera time on ESPN? THE HORROR! How dare, Iowa State go about letting college kids have a quintessential college experience.

But you're still going to focus on the overselling of student tickets aren't you? Because you're ignorant. Allow me to drop some factual information on you, another concept you're unfamiliar with, from our own CyHusker.

Iowa State oversells tickets because when they sold 2,500 (exactly the number of available student seats) only about 60% were consistently used because college kids have commitments and can't make every home game. So they decided to oversell by 1,000. Of course they can only oversell because there was a clear demand for the tickets (I know, I know, another foreign concept to you), they just couldn't be used every game by the same 2,500 students. You know how many times students have been turned away in four years of overselling?

TWICE. What a screw job.

The conversation continued.

Greg: Has ISU won 5 out of the last 6 or 6 out of the last 7? I can't remember.
CW: Iowa State has beaten Iowa 6 of the last 7 but that doesn't have anything to do with...
RP: What the hell are we talking about?
CW: Alright Sean cut him off. This type of caller gets us jaded.
RP: This is asinine, this is asinine.

I only put this in here to demonstrate that the caller was clearly trolling, and this should have ended well before this. It also serves as a bridge to the meat of the rant.

RP: You know what number you should be concerned with? Nine. Nine is the number you should be concerned with Greg. That is nine straight wins for the Iowa Hawkeyes.
CW: I don't think he is concerned about that.

Great. You got us there. Iowa State fans have openly admitted that Iowa has a good basketball team. Those that said otherwise before the season have since admitted their fault. In fact, some are openly rooting for them at this point because it helps ISU's resume.

In case you need another reminder, scoreboard.

But you couldn't let it go.

RP: Another number Greg you should be concerned with is three. Three is a good number to be concerned with. You know what three is? It is the national rank of the Iowa Hawkeyes right now. Another good number Greg? Two. You know what the number two is? The number of teams that experts in this country think are better than the Iowa Hawkeyes. Two teams! I will give you some more numbers Greg. Here is a number. Twelve. You know what twelve is Greg? Twelve is the total number of points the Hawkeyes have lost to, to three teams that are either ranked or receiving votes in both polls. Oh, oh, Greg here is another one 1,2,3,4,5,6,7. You know what seven is Greg? Seven is the number of games the Hawkeyes have won by ten digits in a row.

I'm going to let the "ten digits in a row" thing go. Clearly you were standing and screaming with rage at your microphone at this point. That "damn little brother troll" got you all riled up, didn't he? All of these stats are great. Even if you had left it here, we probably wouldn't have an issue. I mean, sure you were a jerk to Greg, but he probably deserved some of this.

Here's where we start to have problems.

CW: Two, two wins vs RPI Top 25.
RP: Three their total number of loses on the season. You Iowa State fans can keep bitching about schedule all you want. The fact is, suck it up buttercup. The Hawkeyes are a really good team. In both basketball and football, they are a hell of a lot better than you in football, than you will be in a long time in football, and they are creeping up on you in basketball. The one thing you Cyclone fans had to hold on to. THE ONE THING YOU HAD TO HOLD ON TOO! GUESS WHAT IT'S ALMOST GONE! It's days away from being gone, okay? DAYS!! DAYS!! When the Cyclones continue to fall apart and the fan base, I mean the fan base continues to fall apart and get riled up over every loss and worked up. And try to figure out if Prohm should be FIRED in his first season.

Here's a number for you, Ross. 10. As in Iowa State is 10-8 in the last 18 match ups against your vaunted Iowa Hawkeyes in football. Sure you can throw all the bowl games, and rankings at me, but if you were truly a "hell of a lot better than us in football" this would not be the case. Maybe you prefer the number 6. As in Iowa State has won 6 of the last 7 match ups in basketball. Let's take a look at the last five years.

	Iowa State	Iowa
NCAA Tournament Appearances	4	1*
NCAA Tournament Wins	4	1
Conference Tournament Titles	2	0
Record in CyHawk Games	4-1	1-4
Average Conference Finish	3.2	4.6**
Consecutive Weeks Currently Ranked	48	4

* - Nobody counts a play in game because 1) It's not the tournament and 2) you didn't play your way in anyway
** - Would be 5.5 if not for this current miracle run

So please, tell me more about how Iowa's going to take the state's basketball flag in A FEW DAYS you insufferable, pretentious prick.

Hawkeye fans seemingly can't enjoy success without belittling Iowa State. You have a top ten football and basketball team, yet you're not satisfied unless you're trying to take a dump on Iowa State. Why can't you just go enjoy your run through a top-heavy B1G without trying to put down a team and fan base that has clearly surpassed you in every way in the sport in recent memory?

NOBODY DENIED THAT IOWA IS A GOOD BASKETBALL TEAM. Even that troll, Greg, was arguing about attendance, but you chose to hijack the conversation and do what Hawkeye fans are known for - belittle Iowa State fans and attempt to make sure that they are put in their place. You just can't handle the fact that Iowa State has had the sustained success that they have.

Suck it up Buttercup.

To your last point. You know, the one outlier among the fan base that's "falling apart" and wanted Steve Prohm fired? Not only is that an outlandish stance to stereotype of an entire fanbase, but you chose to double down.

CW: That was one guy.
RP: That is another good number ONE!
CW: That is one guy.
RP: Number of callers who wanted to fire Steve Prohm. Here is a great number, ZERO, the number of callers who wanted to fire Fran McCaffery. Good job Greg.

The most ironic comment of it all. Allow me to direct you to the following Grantland (RIP) article from just six months ago. Perhaps you want to look a little bit more at the recent fan reaction to your vastly superior football program.

"It's been five years now of unremarkable football, is probably the best way to put it," says Marc Morehouse, who took over the Hawkeyes beat at the Cedar Rapids Gazette in 1999, the same year Ferentz arrived in Iowa City, and who has seen more than his fair share of unremarkable football. "I've covered Ferentz since he's been here, and the ‘hot seat' concept has come up in the past, but I've never taken it seriously. ... I've never bought into it, but this year, even in November, even in January after [the bowl game], I'm buying into it. OK, this is a real hot seat now. This is a hot seat year, no question about it."

But again, that doesn't fit your douchey Hawk-fan narrative.

Why don't you spend your time finding more bobble head and pizza type giveaways to bribe your students to games? Why don't you find a few more community colleges to offer season tickets to? Why don't you try fundraising some more money just in case you decide to fire your football coach that might be bad again real soon?

While you're at it, can you just go enjoy your success without being a massive tool about it? Or are we going to be here the rest of your impressive season #TalkinBoutTheClones?