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The Mid-Morning Dump: *fart noise* USMNT *fart noise*

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The United States will not be participating in the next World Cup.

MMD

#SYNERGY. Corporate middle-management around the globe would be proud of all of the synergy that Iowa State has flashed on offense and defense this season.

PROTECT THE ROCK. Running backs coach Lou Ayeni is leading the charge for ISU’s ball security.

UPSET FUEL. Kansas’ David Beaty is convinced that if Iowa State can beat Oklahoma, Kansas can beat Iowa State.

TWISTER SISTERS REVVING UP. Get the lowdown on the 2017-18 edition of Cyclone women’s basketball.

LOFTY GOAL. Bridget Carleton’s ultimate goal? Make the 2020 Canadian Olympic team.

NIGERIAN NIGHTMARE. HBD to Daniel Edozie!

USMNT OUT. In a shocking disappointment, the United States will not qualify for the upcoming World Cup after losing to Trinidad and Tobago.

SOCCER RANT. This rant on the USMNT pretty much hits the nail on the head.

REASON FOR OPTIMISM? Here are some players who might make you feel like the USMNT can get better.

SILENT KNIGHTS. The Las Vegas Golden Knights had a 58 second moment of silence before their first home game to honor the victims in the Las Vegas attack.

GO ‘STROS. The 2017 Houston Astros are a beautiful fit for the city of Houston.

ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST. This is what it looks like to be in class while watching your favorite MLB team get eliminated from the playoffs.

KIZER OUT. Your new Cleveland Browns starting QB is Kevin Hogan. No, I don’t know who that is either.

NOOOOOPE. If you have a fear of heights like me, this totally safe special effects trick would be as terrifying as this tourist makes it look.