ESPN announced on Thursday that on September 23rd they will take their College GameDay crew on the road once again and broadcast live from.....New York City?
Its a bold move, one that includes broadcasting a college football pre-game show from a site without a college football game or really any care in the world for the sport. It was a lousy week of games including the likes of Iowa vs Penn State and Oklahoma State playing TCU, so I guess we can’t really blame them. After all, it was highly unlikely they were coming to Ames for Iowa State vs Bye anyway.
At this point it is anyone’s guess as to where College GameDay will go next, but we here at WRNL have some insider information.
Week Five: SCI-Somorset Penitentiary
With a big showdown between Indiana and Penn State on the docket, we are predicting ESPN to broadcast live from this medium-security prison in Pennsylvania. Home to former Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky, the prison will host the GameDay crew from Cell Block A and allow Somorset’s warden to make guest picks.
Week Six: Topless Poolside at Caesar’s Palace
The rip-roaring San Diego State Aztecs come to town to take on a UNLV team that we predict will bounce way back after their opening weekend loss to Howard. Las Vegas resident Brent Musberger will be making his celebrity picks from Katherine Webb’s VIP cabana. Eyes on the camera Brent.
Week Seven: Cater Park, Site of the Bowling Green Massacre
Before the Ohio-Bowling Green match-up there will be a moment of silence for those lost in the Bowling Green Massacre. Hours before that the GameDay crew will preview all of the day’s top games with celebrity guest picker Kellyanne Conway.
Week Eight: South Beach, Miami
Ahead of the Buffalo vs Miami (OH) football, the GameDay crew will be live from South Beach, Miami just 1,162 miles from the home of the RedHawks. ESPN fully intended to broadcast from Ohio, but Herbstreit vetoed the choice, saying Miami of Florida was close enough. Herby wanted an opportunity to work on his tan.
Week Nine: Miracle Village, Florida
Leading up to a battle between two of the nation’s most under-achieving teams, the GameDay crew will broadcast live from Miracle Village, Florida. ESPN felt bringing the show to a small community of sex offenders would be a great way to showcase the Baylor football program leading up to their match-up against Texas.
Week Ten: Truth or Consequences, New Mexico
Yes, this place is real and yes it will be the perfect setting leading up to Utah State vs New Mexico. Maybe ESPN will get coach Bob Davie to tell the truth in regards to recent allegations or else...
Week Eleven: Vatican City
Week 11 of the college football slate includes the renewed “Catholics vs Convicts” rivalry between Notre Dame and Miami (FL). ESPN producers figured it was fitting place to go, considering it is the home of “three Hail Marys”.
Week Twelve: Lubbock, Texas
Just kidding, they would never return to a shit hole like that. Week 12 is up in the air.
Week Thirteen: Monowi, Nebraska
Hey, will you look at that? Iowa finally gets their College GameDay experience this football season. The crew will travel to Monowi, Nebraska (Population: 1) in anticipation of the best damn rivalry in sports (Iowa vs Nebraska). A small, intimate town is a good choice this week considering the national apathy surrounding this football game.
Week Fourteen: Nick Saban’s Anus
With a microscopic set of college football games, ESPN decides traveling isn’t worth it. They stay at home, firmly entrenched up Nick Saban’s buttocks.
Week Fifteen: Moscow, Russia
There is nothing more American than the Army vs Navy football game and there is no place more American to host College GameDay than in Russia. Home to America’s most top secret plays, Russia will host GameDay’s first experience abroad. Vladamir Putin will present Hillary Clinton’s picks for the week, which he received via e-mail.
There you have it. The rest of the 2017 ESPN College GameDay schedule. We’ve been wrong before, but we think we have a pretty good idea of the direction ESPN is going after deciding on broadcasting from Times Square in a couple of weeks.
Which stop are you the most excited for?