WRNL Mailbag: Everything Hurts

It’s a doom and gloom type of week for Iowa State. The fans are mad and sad so we figured we would ask some questions to dig our way out of this fun. Though I am sure it won’t work but we could at least try!

Let’s get to it!

Tracks182: Why does everything hurt?

Because we care too much, and probably because you ate too many tacos and are now experiencing some major acid reflux. May be time to cut back on those tacos my friend. Who am I kidding, it is never time to cut back on tacos. Eat more!

Brian: Why does this team like to torment us like this?

I think you and everyone else is wondering the same thing. If we could send a large portion of Cyclone fans to the Iowa Heart Center for tests during games I am certain the test results wouldn’t look so good. I firmly believe right now I think this is just a test of our patience and we will be ultimately rewarded at the end of the season. Stay tuned, hopefully the torture does not persist.

Andy: Can we get a good big player?

I mean we have some? I could be wrong though.

Scott: What is Coach Prohm going to do with 4 forwards next season?

Probably have them on his roster as Iowa State Basketball players I would imagine. We have seen Iowa State play small due to the lack of big men in the past. Now we may have a trend towards more of a big team. He will have to be creative but thankfully we still have basketball left in this season and we don’t have to worry about that just yet.

Nate: Does Monte Morris have anymore eligibility?

Tonte Morris, his cousin that coincidentally looks exactly like Monte and plays exactly the same will be recruited very hard by Iowa State. While unfortunately Monte no longer has eligibility, I think we will be very happy if Tonte wants to join Iowa State.

Taylor: Do you think Purdy will start every game in 2019?

Well, we have been down this road before. With Sam Richardson, Steele Jantz, Jared Barnett, Joel Lanning and Jacob Park. All are quarterbacks that we thought would be the future of the position for Iowa State and start an entire season and then the season following that.

Thankfully with Brock Purdy, he got his moment much younger than all those names above. He will only be a sophomore next season, and barring any injury, I don’t foresee anyway that Brock Purdy isn’t the starting quarterback all season for Iowa State.

Curt: How many steps are in the Campanile?

Well according to our Iowa State history buff Jar_Lar, there are exactly 79 steps in the campanile. No idea how he knows that, but here we are.

Dane: Who was your favorite Power Ranger?

Arguing about which Power Ranger kicked the most ass was practically a sport in the 90’s, but which we mean, it resulted in tons of arguments and fights that never really solved anything. As it turns out, the original Red Ranger is the best, fight me.

Jeff: Twilight Sparkle seems smart because of her love of reading but I don’t think her book smarts are as important as Pinkie Pie’s emotional support of her fellow ponies. Thoughts?

Jeff coming in the clutch with a My Little Pony question. First of all, this is Wide Right Natty Lite, and we don’t much care for the emotional support aspect of things. We are all about brains as we are the smartest Cyclone people around these parts. Therefore, Pinkie Pie can just go kick rocks and stand in the corner because we are taking Twilight Sparkle all day long and then some!

Jay: Is Natty Light technically a real beer?

HOW DARE YOU EVEN ASK THAT JAY!